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5 Ways to Embrace Imperfection

Something has become blatantly obvious to me lately and that is the irony of this blog’s name: Charming Imperfections. One would think by reading that title and description below it that I’m fine with things being less than excellent and don’t mind not having things together all the time. This couldn’t be further from the truth. I confess to being a perfectionist by nature (I credit my Dad for that gene). My claim to finding imperfections charming does not come easily to me, rather it is one of the biggest challenges in my life and the title of this blog is a constant reminder to me that its ok to be imperfect. It is ok that the house isn’t always clean or beautifully decorated. It’s ok that our marriage has its ups and downs and my kid throws tantrums sometimes. It’s ok that I don’t spend every waking minute being productive (this is the hardest one for me).

There are times that I get into a really destructive cycle of having too high of expectations for myself, failing at those impossible ideas, and hating myself for those failures. I’m sure I’m not the only one that struggles with this, so today, I wanted to share 5 ways to embrace imperfection. These are methods and reminders that help me incredibly when I get into the rut of expecting perfection and I hope they are helpful to you too.

  1. Realize you are loved even WITH all your flaws. There is a God in heaven who created you the way you are and loves you for it. If he wanted us to all be perfect, he would have made robots. Obviously he didn’t do that and doesn’t expect that out of us. I have to tell myself constantly that God still loves me when the house isn’t clean, dinner isn’t tasty, and I don’t have it all together. Not only does God still love me, but the people who matter the most to me do too!
  2. Understand no one really likes perfection anyway. Perfect homes, perfect bodies, perfect children don’t really leave us feeling better about ourselves. It’s intimidating and frustrating to be around perfection because we all compare, fall short, and hate ourselves for it. So, why strive for that perfection when it’s the imperfections that let us connect and relate to each other on a deeper level. (below is my imperfect house exactly as it is right now. Ugh it drives me crazy, but it’s ok not to be perfect)
  3. Take a step back. When you find yourself getting angry at something that’s not perfect like a project or house, step away. Make a conscious decision to put it out of your mind, take a break, and replace it with something pleasant. This could mean going outside for a little while to forget about the mess inside, going on a date to get your marriage away from daily monotony, getting a babysitter to refresh yourself as a Mom. Stepping away will allow you to separate enough from your frustrations to gain perspective on what really matters.
  4. Stop looking at Pinterest and Facebook. Social media can be wonderful and has it’s advantages, but sometimes I wonder at the destruction it can cause. People only post the best of themselves, the happy times in their lives, the beautiful parts of their homes, and their successes and we compare that with the worst parts of our own lives. It can be the most discouraging and damaging thing to a woman who doesn’t have it all together (ie. all of us). Just put your phone down, close the laptop, and look at how beautiful your REAL life is, imperfections and all.
  5. Allow yourself to be imperfect. This is the most freeing and revolutionary thought I can give to myself. I literally have to sigh in relief when I give myself permission to be imperfect. After all, the expectations to be perfect only come from yourself. God, your family, your friends, and the rest of the world don’t have these expectations for you, therefore the only one that has the power to eradicate them is you! Say it out loud: “It’s okay to be imperfect”. Doesn’t it feel amazing?

Let’s go forward from today and embrace our imperfections! Maybe, just maybe our lives will fill with more relaxation, more laughter and joy, and less stress and self-imposed frustration. Maybe, instead of getting more done, we’ll find happiness in the things we already have done. So, who is with me? Are you ready to reject the expectation of perfection your life?

I’ve shared a few glimpses of my imperfect life. In celebration of our imperfections, lets all share some photos or stories of our imperfections and put some realistic homes and lives on the internet for a change. Comment below, or share on instagram, facebook, or twitter with the hashtag #embracingimperfection. It’s time to start a revolution, who is with me?

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Comments

  1. Abby says

    March 18, 2015 at 4:21 pm

    Such great reminders! I think it’s also interesting to note that, often, what you view as imperfection is the exact thing that someone else admires about you. It just takes all kinds, and perfect would be so boring.

    Reply
    • [email protected] says

      March 18, 2015 at 4:28 pm

      So true! If only we really hear what others are thinking of us, and not just what we think they’re thinking.

      Reply
    • Justine Y says

      March 18, 2015 at 8:46 pm

      So true Abby!

      Reply
    • [email protected] says

      March 26, 2015 at 12:55 pm

      That is such a great point! If only we gave ourselves the same amount of slack and admiration we give others.

      Reply
  2. Julie says

    March 18, 2015 at 4:37 pm

    Good reminders! Thank you!

    Reply
    • [email protected] says

      March 26, 2015 at 12:54 pm

      Thank you for the sweet comment!

      Reply
  3. Creative Mama Renee says

    March 18, 2015 at 4:39 pm

    Thank you for taking time to write this!
    I too struggle with the ups and downs of being imperfect. I get on a roll, then I realize the mountain I’ve made myself is a little too high to accomplish, so then I stand, stuck at the base, not knowing how to climb it.

    Thank you for the reminders that being imperfect isn’t all that bad (and is in fact, human)!

    Reply
    • [email protected] says

      March 26, 2015 at 12:53 pm

      What a great analogy! and it’s true, we are all just humans, charming and imperfect.

      Reply
  4. Amanda Marie says

    March 18, 2015 at 4:57 pm

    Great posts! Thanks for the great tips! It is more important to spend life with loved ones and friends, the mess in your kitchen is not that urgent! Over the past few years I have given in to all the stress of trying to control so many things and just let go and prioritize my time and what is most important to me! Stepping back from things really helps you to breath and figure everything out! Thanks for sharing!!

    Reply
    • [email protected] says

      March 26, 2015 at 12:52 pm

      So true! Just step back and take a deep breath. Thanks for the sweet comment.

      Reply
  5. Lisa says

    March 18, 2015 at 5:04 pm

    I’m a total perfectionist and it’s so easy for me to see lots of imperfections, but I dont always find them charming. I’ve really been working on trying to cut myself some slack. Thanks for sharing this! Today was one of those days where I needed to be reminded that it’s ok to not be perfect.

    Reply
    • [email protected] says

      March 26, 2015 at 12:51 pm

      I’m so glad to have been a help! , we perfectionists need the reminder to take it easy sometimes, don’t we?

      Reply
  6. Jenessa says

    March 18, 2015 at 6:10 pm

    Your point about stepping away from Social Media is spot on! When I get overwhelmed with life and the need to be perfect or not feeling enough the first thing I do is take a technology break. Thank you showing that I am not alone in the fit again feeling enough and teaching me to embrace my imperfections.

    Jeness
    savoringthesandhills.com

    Reply
    • [email protected] says

      March 26, 2015 at 12:50 pm

      Your welcome Jenessa! We’re all in this together!

      Reply
  7. Justine Y says

    March 18, 2015 at 8:45 pm

    Thank you for this. I love what you said about social media. Whereas I do think it’s nice to be positive and try to put your best face forward, it’s important to know that things aren’t always sunshine and rainbows. No one and nothing is perfect, not even your favorite Instagrammers with the sparkling homes and drool-worthy recipes. :)

    Reply
    • [email protected] says

      March 26, 2015 at 12:50 pm

      Right, we definitely can’t go the other way and be super negative, but it’s ok to be real sometimes. Thanks for the sweet comment.

      Reply
  8. Betty says

    March 18, 2015 at 8:50 pm

    These are good points to think about. I like that God loves us with all our flaws.

    Reply
    • [email protected] says

      March 26, 2015 at 12:49 pm

      Indeed! He knows we aren’t perfect :)

      Reply
  9. Holly says

    March 18, 2015 at 9:35 pm

    great tips! I fall into this rut all the time as well, it’s so easy to look at social media and get down on yourself but I choose to remind myself of what I did that day vs what I didn’t!
    I’ll get to those tomorrow :)

    Reply
    • [email protected] says

      March 26, 2015 at 12:48 pm

      That’s a really good point, to remember what we’ve accomplished, rather than what we think we should accomplish compared to others.

      Reply

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